Maybe the Most Important Day in History?
folks folks folks. That’s right three folks, because this is huge. Seriously, like bigger than your grandmothers but, today, July 14, in history, is never to be forgotten. You got that? Okay good, now let’s get started because I have a lot to talk about now that we’ve covered the glorious Storming of the Bastille.
July 14, 1099–> The Holy Land is Captured in the First Crusade
Going waaaay back on this July 14. Today all those years ago, christians from Europe after a seven week siege, and upon its capture, these good upstanding devout christians who preach love, forgiveness, and kindness proceeded to massacre a whole bunch of Jewish and Muslim residents of a top 3 historical city. Christians in Jerusalem were increasingly persecuted by the city’s Islamic rulers in the 11th century, specifically when control of the holy city passed from the somewhat accepting Egyptians to the Seljuk Turks in 1071. Late in the century, Byzantine Emperor Alexius Comenus, also threatened by the Seljuk Turks, askd the West for help. Then in 1095, good ol’ Pope Urban II called for a crusade to help Eastern Christians and recover the holy lands. The response by Western Europeans was immediate.
July 14, 1798–> Sedition Act Passed
In an act that limited mobility to the United States and threatened liberty, Congress passed the Sedition Act today. Usually paired with the Alien Act, which did things such as increase the number of years required for an immigrant to live in the States in order to gain residency, the Sedition Act permitted the prosecution of individuals who voiced or printed what the government deemed to be malicious remarks about the president or government of the United States. So yea, literally squashing freedom of speech, not a great look for the US. About 14 Republicans, mostly journalists, were prosecuted and jailed under the act. While engaged in small naval hostilities with France in what became known as the quasi war, federalists in congress led by Alexander Hamilton passed this act with the consent of President John Adams (look up Adams and what he did during this time, I don’t have time to go into it but he deserves more credit) capitalizing on wartime fears of the citizens of the United States. It’s almost as if history repeats itself…
July 14, 1881–> Billy the Kid Shot Dead
Born Henry McCarty, also known as William H Bonney, was shot and killed on this July 14 1881 by Sheriff-on-his-trail Pat Garrett. Garrett, who had been hot on Billy for months, shot McCarty at Maxwell Ranch in Fort Sumner, New Mexico. Billy the Adult Kid was notorious for being involved in the Battle of Lincoln, part of the Lincoln County War, fought over control of cattle and dry goods interests in the New Mexico Territory. Billy the Kid was imprisoned for the murder of Sheriff William Brady on April 1, 1881 at Turnstall Ranch, where he worked at the time. After breaking out of jail, Billy was on the run for a while until he was caught and killed by Garrett. RIP in peace Billy.
July 14, 1968–> Henry “Hank” Aaron Hits 500th Dinger
Today marks the 500th career home run by one Henry Aaron, otherwise known as Hank. Hank, the all time leader in home runs, knocked his 500th in a 4-2 win against the San Francisco Giants. Just the seventh player at the time to hit 500 home runs in a career, Hank wasn’t done, as you may well know. Between 1969 and 1973 he hit 203 home runs-keep in mind the fact that he was 35 in 1969. Hank would in 1976 with a record 755 home runs, much to the dismay of baseball’s more racist fans. Thanks Hank!!!
July 14, 1995–> MP3 Officially Named
Oh wow. So many influential things on the docket today, my head is quite literally spinning. Known at the time as MPEG-1 Audio Layer 3, the technology was a more efficient format for the encoding of high-quality digital audio employing a data-compression algorithm. In laymans terms it was a way to make CD music files small enough to be stored in bulk on the average computer and transferred manageably across the Internet. Released to the pubic one week earlier, the brand-new MP3 format was given its name and .mp3 extensionon today in ’95. The music on a CD is encoded so that one second is equivalent to about 176,000 bytes of data, and a three-minute song to around 32 million bytes (32MB). In the mid-90’s (great times), when it was not uncommon for computers to have hard drive space of a mere 500MB, it was unheard of to store one album’s worth of music on a computer. And given the speed of a 56K dial-up modem, the works back then, even one album would have taken days to transfer via Internet. So the CD format and the build of standard mid-90s computers helped the music industry hoard off copyright infringement by way of peer-to-peer internet file sharing (Napster, etc.). If they only knew how quickly mp3’s would flip the game on its side, they might have shorted stocks, and then maybe gotten clipped for insider trading. If only right?
July 14, 1986–> Happy Birthday Spongebob Squarepants!!!
See what I mean!? Extremely momentous day in history, a true cornerstone in the history of this column (see what I did there?). You check that DOB, the numbers don’t lie. Last but damn sure not least, we gather here today to wish a big ol’ happy birthday to the man, the myth, the legend, Spongebob motherfucking Squarepants. That’s right ladies and gents, today Spongebob turns a whopping 31!!! Now, I know what you’re thinking, “Spoon, Spongebob never gets his license, that’s like one of the biggest and best running jokes of the whole series”, but before you go on berating me, you’re wrong. In the episode “No Free Rides” Mrs. Puff gives our yellow friend his license simply so she won’t have to deal with him and his antics anymore. Not the best idea Mrs. Puff, but I get it. Either way, HAPPY BIRTHDAY SPONGEBOB, THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING!!!!!
Thanks everyone, more to come so stay tuned!